To discipline a child

It's natural for children to give their parents headaches before they are shown proper guidance or discipline. Some children are hyperactive and pose greater challenges than others. But all should be accepted and loved, and parents should remember that the objective of discipline is to teach.

Disciplining a child does not always mean punishment, because the long-range goal is to teach children to discipline themselves and exercise self-control rather than blind obedience. Good behavior is relative, of course, and standards vary from one family to the next. Obviously, early safety lessons are the most important. Small children need guidance more than punishment, and the purpose in punishing a child is not to get even but to teach. A time-out is an effective punishment for children of almost any age, as is rewarding good behavior. Remember to keep your rules succinct and simple and, whether or not you agree in spanking a child, never to shake a child or hit them in the head.

There are some children who would pose challenges to any parent. They are strong-willed and intensely curious, prone to troubled sleep and feeding problems, and have been so since birth. Some may be hyperactive, though that means they are also exhibiting unusual intelligence. It's important to love and accept even a difficult child, save your energy for major problems by letting him win a battle now and then, and avoid making a full diagnosis until the child is of school age.